Men and women are different.

Wait; don’t go away…there is a point to this.

Men and women are different, and it’s not because of the obvious. Men and women are different due to the way they hold conversations. When men hold conversations, they’re relatively concise and to the point. Sure, we skitter off onto other conversations, but those are relatively concise and to the point as well. For example, I called one of my close friends and we talked for about 41 minutes. Those conversations were about pro wrestling, Tim Tebow (who shall now be known as Our Lord and Savior Tim Tebow), Kurt Warner’s retirement, and video games. I talked to him and his brother, so I essentially had the same conversation twice, but it was clear, concise, and to the point.

Women…I love y’all and can’t live without y’all. But, I’ll be DAMNED if y’all don’t know how to tell a story! I tell my wife all the time, “Cliff’s Notes, baby.” This means I just want a quick beginning, middle and end. She can’t do that; in fact, I think it’s a physical impossibility. Her Cliff’s Notes ends up being longer than what the story would be in the first place! How does that work?!

It’s not just her; oh, no…I have rarely met a woman who didn’t know how not to condense a story. I can tell any female friend I have that I just want the Cliff’s Notes version of a story, and I end up getting War and Peace. There are some that know what I mean by Cliff’s Notes, and they actually deliver. There are also some that know how to deliver conversations the way the fellas enjoy them. Then, there are those who tell their life story, the life stories of the people involved in the story, the life stories of the background characters – and there are plenty background characters, et cetera, et cetera, ad infinitum, amen.

Chris Rock did a skit on the differences between men and women on his Bigger and Blacker album. To wrap this post up, I’m gonna post part of it here, and let video tell the rest.

“Relationships: easy to get into, hard to maintain. Why are they so hard to maintain? ‘Cause at some point you just stop talking. That’s right, everybody stops talking after a while. You know how it is. You come home and you start nodding.

‘Yeah, we cool.’

‘l’m gonna get a little something to eat.’

“Why do you stop talking? ‘Cause at some point, you have heard
everything this person has to say…and it makes you sick to your stomach. You know what they’re gonna say before it even comes out their mouth…and you just wanna stab them in the neck with a pencil!

“Your can’t take the shit no more! And they’re like, ‘Remember that time?’

‘Yeah, l remember that time!’

-‘l ever tell you about–‘

-‘Yeah, you told me about that time! Stop telling me the same shit
over and over again! Why don’t you go out and get kidnapped,
have some new shit happen to you?’

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